How to Write a Letter to Your Daughter That She'll Never Forget — Dr. Michelle Watson Canfield (2024)
Michelle Watson
One of the greatest gifts you can give your daughter is to affirm her through writing. In a world where written communication is most often casual (texts, emails, tweets), a letter in your own handwriting stands out.
I’ll never forget when Abba Project dad Dennis surprisingly noticed that his thirteen-year-old daughter Olivia not only kept the letter he wrote her, but placed it on top of her desk for her friends to see. He had completely expected her to be embarrassed by his card and hide it, especially from her peers. So, as you can imagine, his heart melted when he saw the positive impact his written words had made.
The beauty of putting your thoughts, dreams, love, truth, and feelings for your daughter into written form is so that she can read and reread it. She will treasure the things you write to her both now and for years to come.
How do I know this? Because I and many other girls save our dad’s notes…forever!
I’ll tell you a heart story to bring this to light. My dad started a tradition a number of years ago of creating one-of-a-kind birthday cards for all of us girls by using a template on his computer. [You can find the tools you need to create your own cards by typing the words “Hallmark Cards Studio Software” into your search engine.]
Without a doubt, my all-time favorite card is the one he made for my 50th birthday. He made a list of 50 things he and my mom love about me and number 33 is the one that melted my heart:
“SHE LOVES THE FROGS AT HER HOUSE.”
Here's a photoof my 50th birthday card from my dad:
I laughed uproariously when reading that because I had no idea he’d remembered such a seemingly insignificant thing that I’d said. But it showed me that he had listened when I said I absolutely love the sound that the choir of frogs make twice a year at the end of my street. It’s music to my ears. And he counted it among the things he loves about me.
And just so you know this annual card tradition continues to touch my heart, here’s the cover of the card my dad just gave me two weeks ago for my 62nd birthday. In other words, we girls are never too old to enjoy and treasure handmade cards from our dads!
I share all of this to say that whether or not you’re artistic or creative, just the fact that you notice and bring to light the unique things about your daughter, things you find adorable, enjoyable, and memorable, you are providing a pathway to her heart that will be a treasure to her forever.
Whether or not you’ve written letters before, here are a few dad-to-daughter letter-writing ideas to add to your repertoire:
What was one of the first things you remember about her when she was born and you looked at her for the first time?
What beauty did you see in her then and what beautiful features do you see in her now?(Girls love hearing about their eyes, smile, and the unique features that you see as beautiful)
Write about a favorite childhood memory you have of her
What strengths do you believe she has, both in terms of skill and in her person? (her character, personality)
Tell her specific reasons you’re proud of her
Write about what obstacles you have seen her overcome—emphasize such qualities as courage, resilience, strength, commitment, endurance, power
Write about dreams you have for her future, whether in the form of your wishes for her or things you pray about for her—do this without preaching or lecturing, only encourage
Tell her what it means to you to spend time with her
Communicate why you love being her dad in this season of her life (add current things about her age right now that you’re aware of and highlight them as positive)
Let her know that you will always be there for her, telling her what it means to you to be her dad
If writing isn’t your thing, still do it (I know…I’m being a tough teacher right now). I promise that your daughter will thrive in direct proportion to the words you speak (verbal and written) into her life.
And the more you hone your writing skills, the easier it will become.
On your mark, get set, write!
categoriesTaking Action
tagsWriting, Reconnect, Fathering, Action
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Write about what obstacles you have seen her overcome—emphasize such qualities as courage, resilience, strength, commitment, endurance, power. Write about dreams you have for her future, whether in the form of your wishes for her or things you pray about for her—do this without preaching or lecturing, only encourage.
Tell her what it means to you to spend time with her. Communicate why you love being her dad in this season of her life (add current things about her age right now that you're aware of and highlight them as positive) Let her know that you will always be there for her, telling her what it means to you to be her dad.
Start off with a sweet salutation like, "Dear darling," "To my love" or using their special nickname so they know this letter is all about them. Don't be afraid to get mushy to really set the mood. Next, tell them why you're writing a letter instead of just signing a generic card.
“A” and “I.” Those are the only real single-letter words in the English Language. But there are single-letter words in our “Text Language.” Letters like “B” (for be), “C” (for see), “K” (for okay), “N” (for and), “R” (for are), “U” (for you), “V” (for very), and “Y” (for why).
Use encouraging words like, “You can do it!” and “Wow you worked so hard on that!” Page 2 3. Make up relaxing journey stories with your child as the main character to help your child go to sleep at night feeling loved. 4. Use a soft tone of voice when you speak to your child.
"You are not just my daughter; you are my heart, my soul, and the reason I wake up with a smile. Happy Daughters' Day, my love." 8. "On this special day, I want to express my gratitude for all the love and happiness you've brought into my life.
Providing validation for our child's emotions says to them that we see them, we understand them, and we love and accept them exactly as they are. This can be as simple as looking our kid in the eyes and sincerely saying, “That sounds really hard.I can see why you feel so upset.
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Introduction: My name is Ray Christiansen, I am a fair, good, cute, gentle, vast, glamorous, excited person who loves writing and wants to share my knowledge and understanding with you.
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