Neil Patrick Harris and David Burtka's Relationship Timeline (2024)

Table of Contents
April 1, 2004: Neil Patrick Harris and David Burtka go on their first date November 2006: Neil Patrick Harris comes out to PEOPLE, keeping his relationship with David Burtka private April 2007: Neil Patrick Harris confirms relationship without naming David Burtka September 16, 2007: Neil Patrick Harris and David Burtka make their red carpet debut at the Emmy Awards June 2009: Neil Patrick Harris responds to rumors of starting a family with David Burtka August 2010: Neil Patrick Harris and David Burtka announce they are expecting twins via surrogate October 12, 2010: Neil Patrick Harris and David Burtka welcome twins Harper Grace and Gideon Scott June 25, 2011: Neil Patrick Harris and David Burkta announce their engagement following the legalization of gay marriage in New York January 18, 2012: Neil Patrick Harris and David Burtka open up in Out magazine March 2014: Neil Patrick Harris and David Burtka move to Harlem, New York September 6, 2014: Neil Patrick Harris and David Burtka wed in Italy October 2014: Neil Patrick Harris and David Burtka appear on American Horror Story November 2014: Neil Patrick Harris and David Burtka star in an advertising campaign February 22, 2015: Neil Patrick Harris hosts the Oscars with David Burtka by his side November 2016: Neil Patrick Harris and David Burtka take their annual family trip to Disney World October 31, 2017: Neil Patrick Harris and David Burtka share their family Halloween costume March 2019: Neil Patrick Harris and David Burtka share their favorite things about each other April 16, 2019: Neil Patrick Harris supports David Burtka's first cookbook November 2020: Neil Patrick Harris and David Burtka show off dogs in PEOPLE's Sexiest Man Alive issue February 2021: Neil Patrick Harris takes care of David Burtka after spinal surgery August 2021: Neil Patrick Harris and David Burtka list their Harlem brownstone for sale April 1, 2022: Neil Patrick Harris and David Burtka mark 18 years since their first date December 25, 2022: Neil Patrick Harris shares a family Christmas photo February 14, 2023: Neil Patrick Harris shares a cute Valentine's Day photo of David Burtka and their kids April 1, 2023: Neil Patrick Harris and David Burtka celebrate 19 years together June 16, 2023: Neil Patrick Harris and David Burtka take the GQ Couples Quiz September 6, 2023: Neil Patrick Harris and David Burtka celebrate their 9th wedding anniversary FAQs

Neil Patrick Harris and David Burtka have been supporting each other since their very first date.

The couple started out as friends after meeting on a street corner in 2004, though their relationship quickly turned into something more. Harris and Burtka went public with their relationship in 2007, and later welcomed twins Harper Grace and Gideon Scott via surrogate in 2010. Following the 2011 ruling that legalized gay marriage in New York, the couple announced their engagement, and eventually wed in a private ceremony in Italy in 2014.

Between supporting each other through career changes and cross-country moves, Harris and Burtka have stood by each other through it all. "I'm simply amazed by this awesome man," Harris wrote on Instagram in a birthday tribute for Burtka in 2021. "David is the glue that holds our family together, the constant provider of meals and compassion, and the funniest, most loving man I know."

From their celebratory social media tributes to sweet moments on the red carpet, here's everything to know about Neil Patrick Harris and David Burtka's relationship.

April 1, 2004: Neil Patrick Harris and David Burtka go on their first date

Neil Patrick Harris and David Burtka's Relationship Timeline (1)

Harris and Burtka went to the movies for their first date on April 1, 2004, after meeting in passing on the street.

In a 2012 essay written for Out magazine, Burtka shared that he had had a boyfriend when he met the Doogie Howser star, but that the relationship was already on the rocks and ended shortly afterward.

November 2006: Neil Patrick Harris comes out to PEOPLE, keeping his relationship with David Burtka private

In an exclusive interview with PEOPLE, Harris publicly came out as gay in 2006. "I am a very content gay man living my life to the fullest and feel most fortunate to be working with wonderful people in the business I love," he said.

The interview came two months after season 2 of How I Met Your Mother began airing on CBS.

April 2007: Neil Patrick Harris confirms relationship without naming David Burtka

A few months after coming out to PEOPLE, Harris confirmed that he was in a relationship on The Ellen DeGeneres Show. In the interview, he spoke to DeGeneres about coming out while maintaining his privacy.

"I'm not a very scandalous person and so I didn't want to have to respond to some story … I just made a statement and sort of squashed the fires," he said. "My life had been relatively open in my world. I've been dating the same guy for three years and our families know. We go out together all the time … I never felt it was an obligation for me to hold pinkies down the red carpet or anything."

September 16, 2007: Neil Patrick Harris and David Burtka make their red carpet debut at the Emmy Awards

Neil Patrick Harris and David Burtka's Relationship Timeline (2)

After three years of dating, Harris and Burtka made their first joint red carpet appearance at the 2007 Emmy Awards.

The 2007 Emmy Awards marked the first of four nominations Harris received for outstanding supporting actor in a comedy series for his role in How I Met Your Mother.

June 2009: Neil Patrick Harris responds to rumors of starting a family with David Burtka

As Harris' How I Met Your Mother costars Alyson Hannigan and Cobie Smulders began to expand their families, rumors swirled that Harris and Burtka were thinking of starting their own.

"We are not currently expecting a baby," Harris told PEOPLE in a statement. Though he did leave the door open for kids, adding, "Maybe someday."

August 2010: Neil Patrick Harris and David Burtka announce they are expecting twins via surrogate

In August 2010 — a year after saying they may "someday" have kids — Harris announced that he and Burtka were expecting twins with the help of a surrogate.

"So, get this: David and I are expecting twins this fall," Harris wrote on Twitter. "We're super excited/nervous/thrilled. Hoping the press can respect our privacy…"

October 12, 2010: Neil Patrick Harris and David Burtka welcome twins Harper Grace and Gideon Scott

Neil Patrick Harris and David Burtka's Relationship Timeline (3)

In October, Harris posted on Twitter to announce the birth of the twins, saying, "All of us are happy, healthy, tired, and a little pukey." Before the twins were born, Harris and Burtka moved into a more child-friendly home in Los Angeles.

"Harper has been fussy but Gideon is the easiest baby in the world," Burtka later told PEOPLE about the first few months with the babies. "They're just now starting to recognize us and smile."

June 25, 2011: Neil Patrick Harris and David Burkta announce their engagement following the legalization of gay marriage in New York

Neil Patrick Harris and David Burtka's Relationship Timeline (4)

When the Marriage Equality Act passed in New York in 2011, Harris and Burtka celebrated by sharing some big news: They had been engaged for five years.

As they later detailed in their essay for Out magazine, Burtka first proposed to Harris in 2007, on the same street corner where they met. Harris later returned the favor, proposing to Burtka on Valentine's Day in 2008.

January 18, 2012: Neil Patrick Harris and David Burtka open up in Out magazine

Harris and Burtka co-wrote an essay for Out magazine. The couple opened up about their relationship, from their first meeting to when they realized that they wanted children.

"Even on that first date, we talked about kids," Burtka wrote. "If he hadn't wanted kids, I don't think we'd be together."

March 2014: Neil Patrick Harris and David Burtka move to Harlem, New York

After Harris' hit show How I Met Your Mother ended in March 2014, he and Burtka relocated to New York City with their twins. The timing was perfect, as Harris began his Tony Award-winning run on Broadway in Hedwig and the Angry Inch that April.

"I assumed [HIMYM] would be a short chapter," Harris told Architectural Digest in 2015. "But the plan was always to come back to New York when the show ended and raise our family."

September 6, 2014: Neil Patrick Harris and David Burtka wed in Italy

Neil Patrick Harris and David Burtka's Relationship Timeline (5)

After 10 years of dating, Harris and Burtka tied the knot in a private ceremony in Italy on Sept. 6, 2014. PEOPLE reported that both Harris and Burtka wore custom suits from Tom Ford and that Elton John performed at the reception.

Pamela Fryman, director of How I Met Your Mother and a longtime friend of Harris, officiated the wedding. "Their wedding vows were so beautiful," said guest Kelly Ripa.

October 2014: Neil Patrick Harris and David Burtka appear on American Horror Story

Harris and Burtka added some horror to their romance in October 2014, when it was announced that they both would appear on separate episodes of American Horror Story: Freak Show.

Harris appeared as Chester Creb — a "chameleon salesman," magician and ventriloquist — while Burtka's character was involved in a "sexy storyline" with Jessica Lange's character, Elsa Mars, in the season finale.

November 2014: Neil Patrick Harris and David Burtka star in an advertising campaign

The couple appeared in their first joint advertising campaign in November 2014. They were the faces of the outerwear brand London Fog's winter campaign.

Harris joked to PEOPLE that working with Burtka was especially easy: "We're the same size, height and weight, so we share one wardrobe."

February 22, 2015: Neil Patrick Harris hosts the Oscars with David Burtka by his side

Neil Patrick Harris and David Burtka's Relationship Timeline (6)

Burtka supported his husband as Harris hosted the 2015 Academy Awards. The couple arrived on the red carpet looking dapper in white and gray tuxedos.

Later in the night, Harris shocked viewers when he stripped down to his underpants on stage, one of the most memorable moments of the evening.

November 2016: Neil Patrick Harris and David Burtka take their annual family trip to Disney World

Harris and Burtka brought Harper and Gideon to Walt Disney World in Orlando, Florida, for their annual family trip, where they got splashed on the Kali River Rapids ride.

In 2021, Harris spoke to PEOPLE about taking the twins to Disney World. "Our kids have grown up appreciating and valuing not only the amusem*nt rides, but the architecture and the Imagineering that goes on," he said.

October 31, 2017: Neil Patrick Harris and David Burtka share their family Halloween costume

Neil Patrick Harris and David Burtka's Relationship Timeline (7)

The parents have been winning the celebrity family Halloween costume competition since 2011 when they first dressed up with twins Harper and Gideon.

In 2017, the family took their costume to the next level, dressing as a "Carnival of Curiosities." Harris posed as a circus ringmaster, and Burtka was unrecognizable as a scary clown. Meanwhile, Harper rocked her look as a bearded lady, while Gideon dressed as the world's strongest man.

March 2019: Neil Patrick Harris and David Burtka share their favorite things about each other

In an interview with Parade, Harris and Burtka answered rapid-fire questions about their favorite things, including their favorite thing about the other. "My favorite thing about David is probably his smile," Harris said.

"Neil's sense of humor," Burtka started, before turning the moment into a joke. "We really have fun just laughing through life, and it's the best part about him, just to laugh. At him."

April 16, 2019: Neil Patrick Harris supports David Burtka's first cookbook

Neil Patrick Harris and David Burtka's Relationship Timeline (8)

Burtka released his first cookbook, Life is a Party, in April 2019. "The book gives a glimpse into our world and how we entertain," he told PEOPLE.

The author also said that while Harris "totally supported" the book, he was busy filming in Vancouver, Canada, for much of the process, leaving the taste testing to Harper and Gideon. "It was lots of fun," the Food Network star shared. "But the kids would ask me, 'tangerine chicken, again?' and 'how many different ways can we eat lemon sole, dad?' "

November 2020: Neil Patrick Harris and David Burtka show off dogs in PEOPLE's Sexiest Man Alive issue

Neil Patrick Harris and David Burtka's Relationship Timeline (9)

The couple showed some love to their dogs, Gidget and Spike, in PEOPLE's annual Sexiest Man Alive issue.

Harris told PEOPLE that he was especially grateful for his pups during quarantine. "Having these sweet dogs that are able to cuddle with you and give you unconditional love is important," he said.

February 2021: Neil Patrick Harris takes care of David Burtka after spinal surgery

In early February 2021, Burtka underwent spinal surgery at New York-Presbyterian Hospital. Harris posted a photo of Burtka in the hospital on Instagram, describing what it was like while Burtka was in surgery. "It's one of the scarier, more hopeless feelings - hoping for the best, trying not to fear the worst, waiting a call with news," he wrote.

Burtka's recovery went well, with Harris saying, "Your strength inspires me."

August 2021: Neil Patrick Harris and David Burtka list their Harlem brownstone for sale

Neil Patrick Harris and David Burtka's Relationship Timeline (10)

In August 2021, the couple put their Harlem home on the market. In their 2016 AD interview, Burtka said that he "just had that feeling" the first time he stepped foot in the prewar brownstone.

April 1, 2022: Neil Patrick Harris and David Burtka mark 18 years since their first date

On April 1, 2022, Harris and Burtka celebrated 18 years since their first date. In an Instagram post, Burtka said, "We always celebrate the first date — because for 7 years of our relationship it was against the law to get married."

Meanwhile, Harris posted his own photo, adding: "Thank you for showing me the capacity of my heart. I love you so much."

December 25, 2022: Neil Patrick Harris shares a family Christmas photo

Harris shared a photo on Instagram of him, Burtka, their kids and their dogs posing next to a Christmas tree. The family of four, plus two of the dogs, looked cozy in holiday-themed garb. Harris also wore a red and white Santa hat with "Papa" written on the front.

"Merry Christmas and much love from Ella, David, Gideon, Spike, Papa, Harper and Gidget," the How I Met Your Mother alum wrote in the caption.

February 14, 2023: Neil Patrick Harris shares a cute Valentine's Day photo of David Burtka and their kids

Harris posted a sweet photo of Burka, Harper and Gideon to celebrate Valentine's Day. In the photo, the twins could be seen wearing candy heart glasses as they sat in front of a collection of Valentine's sweets. Burka stood behind them with his arms stretched out wide.

"My Three Funny Valentines 💌," the How I Met Your Mother alum wrote in the caption.

April 1, 2023: Neil Patrick Harris and David Burtka celebrate 19 years together

Harris and Burtka went on their first date on April 1, 2004. In honor of their anniversary, the couple shared sweet posts about each other on Instagram.

"19 years ago today I went on my first date with this man. Single greatest decision of my life," Harris captioned a series of images with Burtka. "You are the ultimate, most astonishing roller coaster ride, and I can’t get enough. Thank you for believing in me, for believing in yourself, for believing in us. You’re the best husband, the best father, and my best friend."

In a separate post, Burtka wrote: "The good times have outweighed the bad enormously. I am beyond grateful to take this wonderful journey with you. As we grow as people our relationship gets stronger. Thank you for being you, putting in the work & making us the best we can be. I am honored and ecstatic to be by your side."

June 16, 2023: Neil Patrick Harris and David Burtka take the GQ Couples Quiz

While taking the GQ Couples Quiz, Burtka described the best gift he's ever given Harris.

"I have to say your 40th birthday scavenger hunt extravaganza across America," the professional chef said. "Started with a surprise party in Los Angeles, and we went cross country picking up clues and gifts and experiences, [and ended up in] New York [for] another surprise birthday party. Weeklong. Epic. It took me a year to produce."

September 6, 2023: Neil Patrick Harris and David Burtka celebrate their 9th wedding anniversary

The pair marked nine years of marriage with sweet Instagram posts.

Burtka shared a cute picture of his husband kissing him on the cheek along with the caption, “Happy Anniversary!! 9 years ago I married the love of my life… love is timeless!!”

Meanwhile, Harris shared a snap of the two smiling. “What a life. What a journey with you," Harris wrote in the caption.

Neil Patrick Harris and David Burtka's Relationship Timeline (2024)

FAQs

Neil Patrick Harris and David Burtka's Relationship Timeline? ›

Deal of the Day. The twosome began dating in 2004 and Harris publicly came out as gay two years later. The pair expanded their family in October 2010, welcoming fraternal twins Gideon Scott and Harper Grace via surrogate. Harris and Burtka secretly tied the knot in 2014 with only 45 guests in attendance.

How long have Neil and David been together? ›

Harris, who stars in Netflix's Uncoupled, has been coupled with Burtka for 18 years and counting, and it's no wonder—they're so sweet together! "My favorite thing about David is probably his smile," Harris previously told Parade. "Yes, he can cook. And yes, he can throw a party.

Did Neil Patrick Harris and David Burtka meet on How I Met Your Mother? ›

The actors met when they were both on Broadway, with Harris in Cabaret and Burtka in Gypsy. Burtka was in another relationship at the time, and often commuted to Los Angeles to see his then-boyfriend. "I didn't want to be that guy who was creating some sort of romantic interference," Harris explained to Out in 2012.

Who fathered Neil Patrick Harris twins? ›

Neil Patrick Harris has spoken out about his children

The actor welcomed twins with his partner of almost 20 years David Burkta back in 2010 via a surrogate.

Who is Neil Patrick's husband? ›

Neil Patrick Harris and David Burtka are now parents to two teenagers. The longtime couple, who married in September 2014, each took to their respective Instagrams on Oct. 12 to celebrate their twins, Harper and Gideon, turning 13.

Does David Burtka have a wife? ›

Burtka has been in a relationship with Neil Patrick Harris since April 2004.

Does Neil Patrick Harris have a brother? ›

When did Neil Patrick come out? ›

November 2006: Neil Patrick Harris comes out to PEOPLE, keeping his relationship with David Burtka private. In an exclusive interview with PEOPLE, Harris publicly came out as gay in 2006.

What was Neil Patrick Harris in as a child? ›

While tagging along with his older brother of 3 years, Harris won the part of Toto in a school production of. His parents moved the family to Albuquerque in 1988, the same year that Harris made his film debut in two movies: Purple People Eater (1988) and Clara's Heart (1988), which starred Whoopi Goldberg.

Where does Neil Patrick Harris love? ›

Hampton Estate:

Neil Patrick Harris and husband David Burtka have bought this sprawling property on Hands Creek Road in East Hampton for $5.5 million.

Was Neil Patrick Harris' baby in How I Met Your Mother? ›

The first two babies in Barney's slideshow are Neil Patrick Harris' children with husband (then fiancé) David Burtka. Twins (born Oct. 12, 2010) Gideon Scott Burtka-Harris and Harper Grace Burtka-Harris.

Who does Neil Patrick Harris voice on Family Guy? ›

Neil Patrick Harris: Barney Stinson.

How old was Neil Patrick Harris when he played Doogie Howser? ›

A year later, when Neil was 16, he landed the lead role in Steven Bochco's television series about a teen prodigy doctor at a local hospital, Doogie Howser, M.D. (1989), which launched Harris into teen-heartthrob status.

How did Neil Patrick Harris get famous? ›

For his debut role, the then-teenager earned himself his very first Golden Globe nomination. However, it wasn't until the following year that Harris would find the role that would make him a bonafide star. NPH landed the title role in Doogie Howser, M.D., the eventual classic show about a child prodigy doctor.

Where does NPH live? ›

What Broadway shows has Neil Patrick Harris been in? ›

Neil Patrick Harris has performed on Broadway in Proof, Cabaret, Assassins, and his Tony-winning turn in Hedwig and the Angry Inch. He is a three-time Emmy Award winner for his guest-starring role on Glee and as host of the 63rd and 65th Annual Tony Awards.

Who directed How I Met Your Mother? ›

The vast majority of the episodes (196 out of 208) were directed by Pamela Fryman. The other directors were Rob Greenberg (7 episodes), Michael Shea (4 episodes), and Neil Patrick Harris (1 episode).

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