As a pediatrician, I hear it again and again from parents: "My child is a picky eater."
All children are picky eaters at some point or in some way during childhood; it's part of how they assert their independence. But some children are pickier than others, stubbornly refusing to eat everything except a few chosen foods.
So what is a parent to do? A new article published in the journal Pediatrics gives some insight into picky eating — and into how we can prevent it and help.
What does this study on picky eaters tell us?
Picky eating starts early — and stays. Researchers looked at the habits of children ages 4 to 9, and found that picky eaters tended to stay that way. That means that parents need to start early to prevent picky eating, preferably before their child turns 2 (and that independent streak really sets in). So offer lots of different foods, including lots of different fruits and vegetables. Don't cook a separate kids' meal. Let your child eat what you are eating (with one important exception: no choking hazards). That obviously works best if you are eating a variety of foods, so be adventurous yourself.
Temperament plays a role. Sometimes picky eating is part of a bigger problem, as opposed to its own problem. The study found that children who had difficulty controlling their emotions tended to be very picky eaters. What does this mean for parents? If your child has behavior challenges along with picky eating, talk to your doctor. Behavioral health problems are just as important as physical health problems — and as with physical health problems, it's always better to tackle them earlier rather than later.
Picky eaters are usually not underweight. They are often thinner than their less picky peers, but not in a way that is unhealthy. So unless your pediatrician is worried about your picky child's weight, parents should not be.
Parenting plays a role too. The researchers found that when parents were very strict about the foods that the child could (and couldn't!) eat, or were demanding about the child's eating, the child was more likely to be a picky eater. Some of that could be a chicken-or-egg thing: when a child seems picky, parents might be more likely to want them to eat healthy or high-calorie foods — and really want them to finish them. However well-meaning this may be, it can make things worse.
Being positive makes a difference
Much of picky eating may be related to negative thoughts and memories about certain foods, or eating in general. The more that you are upbeat and positive about eating, the more likely your child will be that way too. Here are some ideas on how to do that:
- Have family meals — and enjoy each other during them. Eating together puts the emphasis on the social aspect of eating, rather than the food itself, which can be helpful. It's most helpful if that social aspect is pleasant, so put aside the devices and use mealtimes as time to catch up with each other, tell funny stories and otherwise enjoy the time together.
- Don't force a child to eat. Encourage them to try new foods, but don't get into fights about it. And do not make them finish everything on their plate (the "clean plate club" my parents always encouraged us to be part of is not a good idea). The corollary to this, though, is that you should not let your child snack all day (or fill up on milk or juice); if possible, they should arrive at a meal hungry enough to want to eat.
- Involve your child in meal planning and preparation. Look at recipes together; be willing to try new and different things. Take them shopping with you. If you have the ability to grow some foods or spices, have your child be involved in that, too.
It may take some time for changes to take effect, so be patient. If it seems like nothing is working, talk to your doctor. Together you can figure out what to do.
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FAQs
Picky eating starts early — and stays.
What does research say about picky eating? ›
Research finds that children show more pickiness and food refusal when there are distractors present (TV, toys, etc). Research finds that parents who tend to involve children in choosing food for meals and food preparation are more likely to have children who show less picky eating .
What is the root cause of picky eaters? ›
Causes of picky eating include early feeding difficulties, late introduction of lumpy foods at weaning, pressure to eat and early choosiness, especially if the mother is worried by this; protective factors include the provision of fresh foods and eating the same meal as the child.
Is there a science behind picky eaters? ›
Food flavors also get transmitted through breast milk, and there is evidence that young children are more likely to accept these flavors later, when they begin consuming solid foods. Picky eaters are also influenced by parental feeding tactics, social cues, and the ways that new foods are presented.
Do children grow out of picky eating? ›
Many children's picky eating tendencies improve around age 4 or 5, but some take longer and last into the elementary years.
At what age do kids stop being so picky? ›
Do remember that picky eating is often “developmentally normal.” Children across the globe go through a picky eating phase from about age 2 to about age 4.
Are picky eaters made or born? ›
It appears it be both. Some estimates claim 78% of picky eating is due to heritable or developmental characteristics – how the taste buds and smell centers of the brain perceive flavour and how a child's taste is designed to mature with time.
What vitamin deficiency causes picky eating? ›
Zinc deficiency is common among picky eaters who avoid zinc-rich foods like meat, seafood, and legumes. Zinc is essential for immune function, wound healing, and growth. Inadequate intake can impair immune responses and delay growth in kids. Zinc-rich foods include lean meats, poultry, seafood, nuts, and seeds.
Can picky eaters be cured? ›
Picky eaters can often make lots of progress in about 8 to 10 treatment sessions. It is very common for kids to be slightly picky about what they eat. Finding a child who enjoys green vegetables is certainly harder than finding one who doesn't. But some kids are more than picky eaters.
What is the evolutionary reason for picky eating? ›
Pickiness may have evolved to keep kids from getting sick. When children start to walk, they do not yet know which foods are safe, so avoiding unfamiliar foods can prevent the risk of poisoning as they start becoming independent. Picky eating also benefits other species.
On the mental side of things, people who experience extreme cases of picky eating may be at risk for developing anxiety disorders around food or other phobias related to mealtimes.
What to do when your 7 year old refuses to eat? ›
Tips for parents of fussy eaters
Try to eat with them as often as you can. Give small portions and praise your child for eating, even if they only eat a little. If your child rejects the food, do not force them to eat it. Just take the food away without saying anything.
What is neophobia? ›
Neophobia is the fear of new things. This fear may apply to a variety of new experiences such as trying new foods, friendships, jobs, or destinations. This phobia is a maladaptive coping mechanism and when confronted with new experiences, the fear response exceeds the scope of any realistic threat.
Is there something wrong with picky eaters? ›
Picky eating isn't just a frustrating part of the toddler years. For some teens and adults, restricting food and not eating can become extreme—and even harm their health. Behind it: A recently recognized yet little-known condition called avoidant/restrictive food intake disorder (ARFID).
What is picky eater psychology today? ›
In fact, research shows that parents of picky eaters report heightened feelings of inadequacy, stress, and guilt and frequently experience social judgment and unsolicited advice. It is a primal need to feed our children, so when that need is compromised, it becomes stressful.
Is picky eating a real thing? ›
Lots of kids are picky eaters. Often, they grow out of it. But sometimes picky eating becomes a real problem. Kids can eat so little or so few different foods that it starts to affect their health or their daily lives.
Is there anything wrong with being picky? ›
Being picky can also help you maintain self-respect and prevent you from settling for less than you deserve. On the other hand, being overly picky can lead to missed opportunities and a narrow dating pool, making it more difficult to find a compatible partner.
